Thursday 25th August 2022.
I’ve settled on a genre for my law essays and comics, “grimdark”, sorry everyone. I've been struggling a bit with tone, things no longer use the word "hope" because it gets abused as a disguise for racism: how dare you talk about "hope" when your nation is responsible. It's like saying "I'll pray for you" after setting someone's house on fire. People in Uganda deserve hope, rich people deserve remorse. If you do feel "hope", for f**k's sake please keep it to yourself, because people instantly seize on it as an excuse to not do anything. Also I'm obsessed with this Susumu Hirasawa song from "Berserk" called "Behelit", if you'd like to hear what the inside of my head sounds like, not constantly or I might go insane, there is some Ariana Grande in there.
Some would say I am being subversive, as if you look up "grimdark" it's often scenes of buff armoured soldiers. I think I could paint a pot-plant in a grimdark tone though, and a sewing machine: challenge accepted. Also, Paper Bag Head in my comic (not this character), can't help but be funny in their sarcastic yet kind way. Giving Paper Bag Head protagonist energy is a challenge I am working on. It's as though I need to cross-examine Paper Bag Head to talk more. If someone has a paper bag on their head, it doesn't matter how outgoing their body language is, they are trying not to talk. It's not out of hostility that Paper Bag Head does not want to speak, but perhaps fear that people would not like them, or a fear that their insights would be too grim.
Paper Bag Head also reminds me of videos about Jennifer Lawrence and being "the cool girl". Easier said than done, because merriment is escapism and I don't begrudge anyone that (party on, Finnish Prime Minister) but leaving the facade of "cool" in favour of "serious" can paradoxically be what makes a character appreciated. The fact that they are a jester cannot be repressed though. You should see the juggling and handstands climate activists do in watch-house holding cells.